Friday, June 3, 2011

When I Look To The Sky

Sometimes you just connect with someone.  They can live very far away, and you may never meet them in person, but still a bond is formed through shared ideas, common beliefs, and sometimes it's just something you can't fully explain that brings you together and makes you click.  I recently found that in another blogger, and it truly is a gift.

Yesterday, it was absolutely gorgeous here.  The sun was shining and a breeze was blowing, so I headed out to our backyard to hang out in the hammock and drink it all in.

I wish I was one of those people who could close my eyes and drift off to sleep to the gentle sounds of of the tides rolling in and the swaying branches overhead, but I'm not.  I think maybe it's because I'm afraid I might miss something, like the sight of an Osprey diving into the water searching for lunch, or a the chance to get a wet kiss from a loving pup.

If only I could let my mind slow down or even stop for a moment so that I wasn't always plotting how to fix the world, or trying to figure out a way to invent something to prevent dust from accumulating in my house, but then there are other times when I embrace this trait of mine.

Times when I'm glad my senses are sharp, that I've kept my eyes wide open, so that I didn't miss something that others might pass by or simply ignore.

I've been thinking about my friend Dan a lot lately, missing him and wishing we could have a good chat like we used to, and yesterday was one of those days when I longed to hear his voice again.  And just then, I looked down and saw it, a tiny white feather.  Now you might think to yourself, so's just a feather?!  But then you wouldn't know Dan and how he would send such a beautiful little gift my way.

You see, I spoke to his wife just a few weeks ago, so excited to share in the excitement of the Royal Wedding with her, since she lives very near London.  It hadn't occurred to me that for her the wedding took on a totally different meaning.  Instead of seeing beautiful flowers and a princess in the making, it took her back to her own wedding and to the sadness that only someone who has lost a spouse can fully understand.  As we spoke she fought back tears and I reassured her that Dan was all around her...all around all of us.  She told me that just a few days earlier, she had had the windows in their flat open and a small white feather had floated in and landed on a tiny bird's nest she had sitting out as decoration.  She said she knew it was from Dan, and that the feather was still resting just where it had landed.

I also spoke to a blog friend this week via email.  She too has suffered a great loss, and we spoke about how those who leave us are never very far away.  We talked about signs, and how if you just know where to look and open your eyes, those signs are all around us.

As the sun set yesterday in a fiery ball of orange and red, I knew that I had experienced a perfect day.  The weather, the feather, the sunset, each one a sign from those we love but are no longer physically here on Earth telling us that they are shining down upon us and letting us know that they are ok.

When I had a conversation with someone in the health field a few years ago and told them that I often felt the presence of those who had left this world around me and that I have learned to listen to that little voice within me, he simply smiled.  He said, we all have that little voice, but some of us stop listening to it, so it stops speaking to us.  I will never stop listening, and I truly hope it never stops speaking to me.

When I see a sign like that little white feather yesterday, I take comfort in the knowledge that even in the darkest of times, a light shines through.  I hope that you have a wonderful weekend my friends and that you take a moment and look to the sky!


  1. Kat, your post gave me goose bumps and tears...thank you, my friend, for this sweet reminder to be open and aware...XO

  2. I'm very, very impressed by your words ... what a wonderful post!!!!

    If we are open to everything around us, there's more than we know, more than we feel and more than we see...

    With love, Ingrid

  3. Kat, your writing today and this video gave me chills.

    I don't relax well either. Always afraid the lens of my camera will miss a white feather. :-)


  4. On Wednesday I was having a conversation with a girlfriend I've known for almost forty years. She was telling me how after her father passed she was in her backyard and a hummingbird swooped down on her, which also happened to be her father's favorite bird.

    In turn I told her about when I made my first trip back to Georgia in 35 years and my first stop was in Axson, the town where my mother was born. I had stopped at Dairy Queen to get a soft-serve, something mom and I always did, whether we were driving around town or across the country. A gorgeous butterfly danced around my car as I got out and I thought how cool that was since mom LOVED butterflies.

    I guess she was really trying to get my attention, because when I returned to my car, the butterfly was laying dead right by my door. I swooped it up and said, "Okay Mom, you can come along with me."

    The trip my mother and I had put off until it was too late to visit relatives together came immediately to mind. The sign mom sent to me is now inside a protective acrylic case and is always packed in the car when I visit "home."

    I agree, the signs are everywhere if we take the time and open our eyes to see them.

  5. Hi Kat,
    How beautifully said. It is so true that those we love are never that far away from us whether here in person or have passed on.

    thanks for sharing your comforting words.


  6. Sign, sign, everywhere a sign... Who sang that? Yes, I believe in signs. And listening to that voice. And blocking out all the background stimuli to listen to your own beating heart. Reminding us that every day is precious.

  7. Dear Kat - I wiped away a few tears when I read your post this morning. The morning my beloved mother passed away - 6 kookaburras landed on the branch of my magnificent Jacaranda tree and started "laughing" with their unmistakable kookaburra churtle (not sure if that if actually a word?) I know in my heart this was a sign from Mum just letting me know that everything was okay. Two years later and every day on my early morning walk I have a kookaburra follow me - flying from tree to tree. Co-incidence? - maybe.... Sign? - definitely!
    This little piece is something I hold close to my heart :
    "In the bottom of an old pond lived some grubs who could not understand why none of their group ever came back after crawling up the lily stems to the top of the water. They promised each other that the next one who was called to make the upward climb would return and tell what had happened to him. Soon one of them felt an urgent impulse to seek the surface; he rested himself on the top of a lily pad and went through a glorious transformation which made him a dragonfly with beautiful wings. In vain he tried to keep his promise. Flying back and forth over the pond, he peered down at his friends below. Then he realized that even if they could see him they would not recognize such a radiant creature as one of their number.

    The fact that we cannot see our friends or communicate with them after the transformation which we call death is no proof that they cease to exist."

    {{a virtual hug to you my friend}} ;)Sharyne

  8. How poignant that Dan sent you the white feather, and one to his wife too.

  9. Wonders and miracles are all around us if we are looking for them. Beautiful post. YOu bless the memory of your dear friend!

  10. Beautiful post today. Everyday, we are surrounded with the beauty of life ... whatever form it takes.

  11. Oh my goodness...Kat I am so happy for you and your dear friends wife receiving such a gift. You know that my sister passed away just in November last year. It was like a horrific scene from an episode of house. A torent of emotions tearing our hearts apart. When she took her last breaths I felt as if the air was sucked out of me too. It has been a day to day process to learn just how to breath again without her here. At night I take my sweet pups outside for little walks. One such night I looked up at the starlit sky. I cried out to her and without expectation I felt her warmth move through me. I have been reading a book that she had just finished reading before she totally unexpectedly passed away. She had said; "Lisa, you must read this book, then you'll know. Then you will understand." I had no idea what she meant but when she passed away I would do almost anything to feel her near me. I have been reading the book and it is called Heaven by Randy Alcorn. It brings me great comfort and also is bringing me an entire new vision of the afterlife. I hope you breathe in this experience of 'heaven' in the feathers sweet lady. Great loss brings great depth. Our souls are connected Kat.

  12. Communication is unmistakable isn't it Kat - can't be forced, can't be wished into existence, but when it happens, we know. Beautiful.

  13. This is just beautiful Kat. Not just any feather, but a lovely white one from angel wings.
    I hope neither of us ever stops listening.

  14. Angels very often send feathers Kat - a poignant and moving post - little tear in my eye.

    Visit a fairytale castle:

    With love and a big hug!

  15. Oh Kat ~ This so hit home. My beloved husband, best friend, my everything, passed away 14 weeks ago today. My loss is monumental and I love and miss him more every day. I hear his voice. We live on a 13 acre hobby farm with lots of outdoor work to be done ~ which he usually did, but a lot of the time, with my help. So now I'm doing those things alone. I want to keep our little place as perfect as he did, so while I'm doing whatever it is, I hear his voice saying, "Good girl". I hope he's watching and approving. Thanks for this blog today. It was very comforting. God bless you.

  16. Beautiful, Kat. I believe in signs and in the fact that we need to slow down and keep listening to them. And hey, if you had fallen asleep, you may not have noticed Dan's feather.

  17. Hi! This post really touched my heart. In 1990 my uncle Louie passed away. He was a well to do man and gave more than he spent on himself and my aunt Ang. When we were kids he would take us to the cemeterey (yup) and we would pick blackberries off the trees and he would toss coins on the gorund and we were so young and silly we always thought we were just finding the money! When he passed away I found a penny on the ground! I picked it up and looked upward and said thanks Unc! I find pennies lying on the ground many times during my daily life and I always thank him for tossing that little bit of cash from heaven! I have many many stories I could share. It is so good to feel the comfort of those we loved and lost. I feel that way about my dad when I watch baseball. when I am having a difficulty and need a hug from my mom! They are all gone and I miss them like mad! Kat, don't ever stop listening! Love you! Anne

  18. Communication like this is such a reassurance for the ones left behind. I often imagine how frustrating it would be to be on the other side and continually try to communicate with someone that is totally oblivious to signs like these! So glad you got it Kat, although I'm sure Dan knew you would. xo ~Lili

  19. Kat, this is one of the most beautiful posts. You know that that sweet little white feather is from Dan and I am so happy to know that you have your eyes wide open to receive these special gifts. Your friend mentioned the book Heaven and I am going to buy myself a copy. God gives us these little signs to bring us comfort and lets us know that our loved ones are with us. The day of Jordan's burial, there were double rainbows over the cemetary when we drove up. The night we followed the hearse back home, the hearse holding my precious son, there was a full moon in the sky. The clouds at the base of the moon formed a heart shape. Another sign of love from above.

    Thank you for sharing your heart.


  20. Kat- you have really touched me with this beautiful post. Like you- I've lost some dear friends recently- the heart aches are still fresh. I also find myself looking for little signs that their presence is still around me. I think this is how we keep our friends near to our hearts. I truly understand your feelings and I am moved by this beautiful story--


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