Happy Birthday Angelfish

23 years ago on September 17th, I was in a helicopter on my way to a hospital to deliver my first child. I wasn't very good at the whole pregnancy thing and had actually spent more time in bed then I had on my feet during the entire pregnancy. But on September 17, 1987 my body had finally had enough, and when my blood pressure went through the roof, due to the preeclampsia, my doctors decided it was time to take action.

I remember it like it was yesterday, the flight nurse came in and started to explain the whole process of flying and how they couldn't turn on the air conditioning in the aircraft until we were aloft. I looked right at him and said, "Oh I've never been in a helicopter before I can't wait!" He looked relieved and said "Good, we have someone who likes to fly."

Originally my dear friend Tracey was supposed to drive me in an ambulance the sixty miles north to the hospital, but when the weather cleared and with traffic time approaching, time was of the essence and so off I flew, leaving Mr. Tide behind. As I left to board the aircraft he said "You can name the baby whatever you want," something we had struggled with over the course of my pregnancy. He went home to gather a few things, since it was nearly 6 weeks before my due date and we had no idea today would be different from any other day...much less a birthday! He slogged through traffic and a few hours later he joined me at the hospital.

He was half hoping that by the time he got there he would have a bundle of joy to hold, but I was still being prepped for emergency surgery, so we just waited together wondering how it would all turn out. This wasn't the way they said it would be, no breathing together, no blissful delivery like we had pictured and heard about. Mr. Tide wasn't even allowed to be in the delivery room because I was given general anesthesia.

He remembers that day, and the ones to follow quite differently than I do. For me it was a blur, one filled with heavy medications and lots of sleep. For him it was a time of worry, I went into tachycardia during surgery and had to be in intensive care for 4 days, they wouldn't even let us turn on lights in the room for fear of me having a seizure, all part and parcel of the preeclamptic. And he was torn between staying with me and being with our tiny little baby who was so very small, but perfect in every other way!

After 8 days in the hospital we were finally allowed to go home, to start our new life together, no longer just a couple but now a family of three. It was terrifying and exhilarating all at the same time! Having this little helpless human being to care for, wondering if we would get it right or if we would fail miserably.

She was so small, and SO colicky, and so wonderful all at the same time! And she grew, and learned, and achieved in ways we could have never imagined! She was cautious and daring, timid yet brave, quiet but exuberant all at the same time!

She taught us more than we could ever teach her, about patience, strength, beauty, and compassion. She is gorgeous on the inside and even prettier on the outside and we are so very proud to be her parents!

She has traveled to far flung places, volunteers to help others, is loyal, works incredibly hard, and doesn't compromise on who she is or what she wants from life!

And although she lives on her own now, she still shares her humor, her wit, her intelligence, many talents, and her zest for life with us through cards, emails, phone conversations, and wonderful visits! I like to say that she was tough in the beginning, but she's made up for it ever since. She is an old soul with wisdom well beyond her 23 years, and I will be forever grateful that "I" was picked to be her mom!

All of the photographs above are her work, she finds beauty all around her while sharing hers with others!

And just like 23 years ago, she is still impatient, and she's informed me that in other parts of the world it is "already" her birthday, so I'm posting this tonight!

Happy Birthday Angelfish, We Love You Bunches!!! :-)