Tuesday, September 13, 2011

If You Only Knew

When I wake up each morning and look out the window on my side of the room, this is what I see, a field full of wildflowers.  Well they are weeds, swamp sunflowers and some purple weed I don't know the name of, but I like to call them wildflowers, it makes them sound prettier.

We as human beings have the ability to do that sometimes, turn weeds into wildflowers or reality into fantasy.  I had just been thinking about that when I popped by Jane's Blog and read her post, on what real life looks like, not the gussied up version we plaster on our blogs so often.  You can check her post out by clicking HERE.

Parts of Jane's post cracked me up, while other parts rang so true for me that it was a little scary.  But the truth is we are all living parallel lives in many ways, and knowing you aren't the only one with dog hair serving as a 5th food group in your house, or that the laundry threatens to eat you alive, makes you feel better.

For those of you with OCD, or who live perfect lives where children sing songs or write you poetry each day, or your husband makes you breakfast every morning (ok well that one is true for me), then turn away...no run away now!

No, that is not how real life is, because if it was, then shows like the "real" anything wouldn't be so popular.  Sitcoms like Father Knows Best (I loved that show!) and Leave it to Beaver would still reign supreme.  And don't misunderstand, I know that any show with the word "real" in the title is anything but real, but the premise that it shows people's vulnerabilities,  or the literal messiness that is real life is what people crave.

When I run in to people at the grocery store they will often say...wow you are so organized, you have so much going on...I don't know how you do it.  I often wander away thinking...were they talking to me?!  No, there must have been someone they knew standing behind me, because honey, if you only knew!

If you only knew how I cussed like a sailor this morning when I cut my finger on my #@$% tripod as I wandered around in my PJs at 8 am taking pictures.

If you only knew that I was frustrated beyond belief that after cutting my finger so bad that it bled like a stuck pig, all of the photos I took looked like crap.  So bad in fact that I am now sending my hugely expensive lens (the one that I've been saving for, the one that broke the budget this month) back to the store I bought it from!  And did I mention that the photo of the juvenile eagle 1 photo up, would have been awesome had the lens worked?!  Sadly, those juveniles don't just show up on my doorstep every day. :(

See that chart in the photo above, it helps you determine if your lens and camera are working properly to get clean, crisp photos (the ones taken with my new lens were horrible).  Yep, Mr. Tide and I spent precious time trying to figure out if it was me, or the lens.   All bets are off when a contest arises to determine if I am wrong or it the piece of equipment I am using is wrong.  9 times out of 10 it is operator error, followed by me saying things like ..."I can't figure this thing out!!", and I walk away in a huff.  Mr. Tide, the man who exemplifies the saying patience is a virtue, usually steps in, reminds me what time of the month it is, and helps in any way he can.  Lest you think he is perfect...he does however have the ability to walk past a folded pile of clothes for weeks without feeling a need to put them away!  And he believes that crumbs spontaneously generate from the kitchen counters, because he swears he wipes them down.  ;-)

If you only knew how much dog hair is on my floor right now you would swear a herd of alpacas live with me.  And yes, I vacuum frequently, but apparently I need to do it twice a day!  Ok, that is never gonna happen!

If you only knew that when the Verizon man showed up at my house yesterday I freaked out thinking, dear lord, I hope he doesn't need to go inside to check the line...maybe I can keep him in the living room and dining room which is straight and moderately dust free!

If you only knew that my dogs were barking and I had no bra on, not a pretty sight! (sorry Papa Jim and Doug if you are reading this!).

In blogland, time and reality are suspended.  There are no broken down barns like in the picture above.  It is edited, so all you see are the pretty flowers, the clean corners of houses, and the ramblings about finding the perfect this or that...but that's not real life.

I want friends who can call me and say, "ok, tell me if you think I'm crazy," and I don't, even if what they tell me would sound crazy to someone else!  And friends who I can call or email and say "ok, I cried because I'm afraid the plane is going to crash or my kids will get hurt while I'm overseas," and they won't tell me I've lost my mind, but will instead tell me that everything will be fine.

If you only knew how other people really lived, you wouldn't be so self conscious about how you live.  You wouldn't feel the need to say, "oh my house is a mess, when you just spent the last 2 days cleaning!"  You wouldn't feel the need to crop a photo once you realized that a pile of mail, or a pile of anything was in the shot.

My life is anything but organized, perfect, or even pretty some of the time, but it's wonderful none the less.  It's full of the good and the bad that make for an interesting life.  I am constantly entertained by the quest for everything that is vintage and imperfect that seems to be the style trend du jour right now.

People are paying exorbitant prices for things that are chippy, rusty, and imperfect and then trying their darnedest to arrange them precisely into their picture perfect worlds.  Does this not sound crazy to anyone else but me?!  Why crave imperfection in things and demand perfection in ourselves...this makes no sense to me, but what the heck do I know anyway!

If only you knew how little I know, how much I have to learn, how far from perfect I am, you would all run screaming for the hills...

***I was asked to re-instate the comments feature on my blog, but please know that for now I won't be able to reply unless you ask a specific question.  I know that sounds ungrateful, because I do love reading every one of them, but right now it's what I need to do, and I thank you for your understanding!"


  1. My wonderful husband took me for lunch today. On the drive there, the dog hair in the car formed a tornado and nearly blinded us. He complained about my restaurant choice and stated "You could have made this better" after every bite.
    On the way home, the ONE paper bill we receive got sucked out the window and blew across the highway. I had to call my gas company and explain their statement was in a swamp.
    By covering up all this LIFE, we live little lies. I say let it all hang out there, bra-less! :D

  2. I thought the eagle photo looked great.

  3. This post speaks to me so much. I am constantly banging on about how busy I am but my house hasn't been cleaned from top to bottom in ages. I usually have one or two rooms which are OK but never the whole house. Someone told me years ago that your kids will never remember how clean their house was growing up but they will remember how much time you spent with them. I think I take that too literally sometimes! I know I have a tendancy to take on more than I can deal with and it shows, particularly in my lack of posts (and the lack of effort in the posts I have written) but I feel uninspired right now. I also have little time to pretty up my house for photos. Life for us (like most) is hectic. One day I'll get my act together but for now we're happy living like pigs!!
    Hope you have a wonderful and safe trip.
    PS - I cuss like a sailor every day!!

  4. A bra?
    quel est un soutien-gorge? Cause I sure don't wear one very often :D

    My dogs fear the rain and we FINALLY had a thunderstorm this am which meant Howie pooped on the living room tile twice this morning.

    Enough reality for you? How about the leaky gutter that I was clearing in the rain, braless in mis matched pj's at 5 am or me designing the last tag for my Halloween Sampler that I have been stuck on for 2 weeks. We all have em...issues
    however My home IS frequently tidy, though not obsessively clean if that makes sense. Anyone can stop by anytime and find a neat home but if they have 20-20 vision they're gonna see some dirt, a lot of dust and doggie hair dirt devils. :D

    sorry about the lens, I know you were so excited....

  5. The only thing I'm perfect at, is being imperfect! Great post Kat and SO glad you turned your comments feature back on for now. xo ~Lili

  6. Love this post Kat. I don't think there's anyone out there who reads our blogs that can't relate. I could list a few things as I look around the room, but I wouldn't know where to stop lol.


  7. No reply necessary.

    This post was perfect. Perfect at letting everyone know that no one is perfect and you know what?!...it's OKAY!!! I have embraced my imperfections perfectly!!!! And I think your "wildflowers" are simply lovely.

    I hear thunder right now. I've only heard it two other times in the 8 years I've lived here. The sound of thunder at this moment is perfect!

  8. What a deep post! I am new at blogging (as you know) but have always known that what I see on blogs isn't the complete picture. I hesitated to even start a blog for a while because I didn't want the expectation of perfection to always be upon me. I've read quite a few "deep" posts today on other peoples blogs. Hmmmm.....is something in the air? You're not alone in how you feel and all I can say is remember that it is YOUR life and you can choose what to worry about and what not to. Don't make yourself crazy trying to have the perfect life and pleasing others. I know this from my own personal experience.

  9. Great post and I was cracking up about the alpaccas. I am trying to catch up the darn ironing pile again. The dust has gone rampant in my house and I just can't keep up with it. I don't know how two people produce so much dirty laundry and trash. It is all beyond me.

  10. You hit the nail on the head with "We crave imperfection in things and perfection in ourselves." What is this all about anyway? And while I am loving my 25 year old expensive Ethan Allen Bedroom set, people are bragging about the dresser they bought for $5.00, that they made look like it belonged in Abe Lincoln's time.

    I'm glad you read my post and for the little shout out. I hesitated at the publish button because there is so much more to whine about in this world, but this is my tiny little world. So while I might blog that I have beautiful flowers on my front porch, I have to let you know I also have ants in my dishwasher and kids that won't grow up!! lol!

    Glad to see you posting and leaving room for comments again, dear girl!


  11. YeY....lol@ me i should wait to see if comments are working for me i am YeY ahead of myself....Never EVER feel you need to replay to anything i comment just following all the blogs i follow is full time it seems and i am also 1 that should be doing this but am doing that kinda girl.....again have a safe and fun vacation Kat!!!!.....sighs i have to use another way to sign in

  12. HA! I walked out to get our mail one day and had the t-shirt on that I slept in and no bra beneath it. Wouldn't you know that a neighbor man drove up and decided to speak to me. I was so embarrassed because my boobs were just a swinging.. HA... he wouldn't shut up and let me get back to the house! Oh gee... I wonder why!!!

  13. Oh, I feel so much better after reading your post. We have a ton of dog hair in our house. I do vacuum once a day, but that's not enough to keep up with it. And let's just not talk about dust. It's my least favorite thing to do. Hubby does step in and do it occasionally.

  14. Thanks for turning the comments back on, I think we all struggle with the guilt of not returning each comment but I do know they are appreciated. I so agree with this post. Real life could be pretty, too if it came with a crop feature. Thanks for keeping it real.

  15. I love you just the way you are ... cluttered, scattered, and covered in dog hair. I wouldn't have you any other way.

  16. Kat, I wouldn't change a thing about you-you are fabulous just the way you are!!! I agree with Jane, I feel better about all the little (some not so little) Golden Retriever dust bunnies I've got at my house! I just can't keep up and really just don't think I want to. You just keep being you my friend!! HUGS!!

  17. did you steal my life??? That is exactly the way I live...so glad I am not alone!
    Love the eagle picture!

  18. I'm glad you added the comments back, even if you aren't responding. I think sometimes we just want to say something in reponse to what we read. This was a great post. I often have people tell me they like my blog because I seem like a real person and it isn't "perfect". I see that as a compliment. Some blogs I read are beautiful, but I walk away thinking, "come on, you don't really eat like that every night or have those throws perfectly perched on the corner of each bed"!

  19. what my beloved DIL said to me last weekend when DS & DIL came over as she pointed to a big hank of dog/cat hair gliding across the floor?

    "you know, you could actually knit with that"...

    ...and what I said is probably considered impolite by most of your readers so I'll just let you imagine" :))

    Perfection is a dangerous illusion...I kind of quit striving for it a while back because I was makin' myself and the rest of my world C R A Z Y...

  20. p.s. of course, some times, I feel I may have lowered the bar just a teeny little too much :))

  21. I am a bit of a perfection so your post helps puts life into perspective. Beautiful wildflowers too!

  22. Love it. I love what one comment said...my house is always tidy but not clean. That's me. :) Don't look too close. ;) Rhoda from Southern Hospitality wrote something like this too. It's worth reading. http://southernhospitalityblog.com/life-is-not-a-magazine-cover/

  23. Hey Kat...we never can really know what clean is until we get really dirty, right! And perfection is soooo last year!

    Have a wonderful vacation and come back with some amazing photos for us, please...xoxo kelley


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.